A ........... of waiters

I was chatting with a seemingly charming four top last evening - the usual topics of the weather, the Olympics, wine, and the lack of a good fishmongers in the south of the city. Life for the middle classes must be hell. I oohed and aahed in all the correct places and nodded along as one must do in such situations. The bill hadn't been paid and the question of my tip was still unanswered. So I had to nod along and make like I gave a tiny little rats ass.

oh ha fucking ha

But it wasn't busy so I was quite happy to talk with them a while. The conversation turned to other restaurants. One new city centre restaurant in particular had been mentioned. I was keen to share my opinion, as I am on almost every subject you care to mention. I mentioned that I and a group of other waiters had indeed visited that particular place quite recently and had been somewhat disappointed. Now I thought the conversation would have continued along that line, why had we been disappointed, what specifically had let us down and so on. But not a word of it. Instead one chap, who had been quiet until that point asked....

"A group of waiters?"

"'Scuse me? I had no idea what he was on about.

"You said a group of waiters."

"Yes...eh...I suppose there were four or five of us." Just where was he going with this?

"And is that the collective noun for waiters?"

"Eh?"

"Group? As in a group of waiters. Is that the collective noun?"

"Em....er....uh...I don't actually think so. Em........" Remember my tip was still swinging in the air so I felt I had to stick this peculiar line of questioning out.

"A group? It doesn't sound right." There was silence as his three companions and I stared at him with perplexed gazes. He took a final swig of wine, turned to me, winked (which was very weird) and announced....

"An absence! That's what the collective noun for waiters is, an absence!" And then roared with laughter repeating, "An absence of waiters!" His many chins wobbled as he laughed.

As I walked away with their cash and my tip, which was generous, I began considering the collective noun for restaurant guests...

....a whinge of guests?

....a bastard of guests?

....a k-ching of guests?

What say you? A .... of waiter/guests?