Sunday, 16 March 2008

It's the anticipation that gets you in the end....

"Cry 'Havoc,'
and let slip the dogs of war;
That this foul deed shall smell above the earth
With carrion men, groaning for burial."

W. Shakespeare

(who to my knowledge never worked as a waiter
but with a line like that maybe he did)
repeated from last years post

The stores are fit to burst, there is drink stashed in every possible cupboard, cubby hole, and crack in the floor.

We have enough Guinness to blacken the poo of all of Belfast's citizens.

We have four fields worth of potatoes, vegetables, and enough salad leaves to feed a thousand rabbits for a hundred years.

Many many pigs, ducks, cows, fish, and baby sheep have been put to the sword for the gluttony ahead.

The music system has been set to the dubious classics of Paddy Reilly, Tommy Makem, The Furey's, The Chieftains, The Pogues and a whole host of other Aran jumper clad men.

The chefs have showered.

The bar staff are sober(ish).

The managers have set down their clipboards.

and I, and my waiters at arms, are ready.....

....now lets have you!

(and the first person to order an Irish coffee is getting a spitter)

21 People trying to get Manuel's attention:

ellie said...

Can we have boiled bacon and cabbage with 2 sides of champ and whle we're waiting a Baileys for me and a pint of the black stuff for my companion. Thanks x

Manuel said...

ellie: no.......oh okay then...

dave said...

You've got your dates wrong dude!
It's the 17th this year...not the 15th.

Can I have a green guinness please?

Manuel said...

dave: no no daveo, St Patrick's begins tomorrow for us.......people start the drinking/eating the day before as they are off the next day.....no guinness for you

Medbh said...

I will be enjoying a quiet day with the pups, Manuel.
More power to you, sir.
May the mayhem be kept at a minimum.

Anonymous Boxer said...

but I likey Irish Coffee...

:-(

OK. Boo. Green effing Beer then.

Don't work too hard! And thanks again for the Irish Chi.

daisyfae said...

three shots of cheap tequila, one whole lime and a shaker of salt...

i won't be needing food. it only dilutes the alcohol, and makes any re-appearance of the tequila a bit mottled and chunky.

no need to dye the stuff green. it won't be out long...

Old Knudsen said...

Can I have an Irish tea?

MJ said...

I'd like an Irish kebab, please.

savannah said...

sugar, we started celebrating on thursday offically, st pat's is damn near a week long event in savannah! ;-)

savannah said...

btw, sorry about the lox & bagels for breakfast, but us not being irish and all ;-)

warriorwoman said...

I had some Irish(man) once.

The beer wasn't bad.

Blondefabulous said...

Freshly showered chefs.... just what I look for in an establishment! Just don't let anyone dye the beer that abombinable green color.

MJ said...

If, as you say, Guinness makes your poo black...does green beer make your poo green?

These are the questions that keep me awake at night.

Quickroute said...

No green beer for me pls !
only thing worse than drinking green beer is watching some puking it up - looks like something out of The Excorcist!

Conan Drumm said...

Top o' the mornin' to ya! Gi's a pint with wan of dem shamrocks drawn on the head... an' do ya know de words to Danny Buy?

yoyo said...

Wow. You got the Chefs to wash? You are indeed a god among men, manuel!

savannah said...

so,i had planned on having red beans & rice today (typical monday meal) but in yer honor, sugar, i'll head over to murphy's law irish pub and have shepherd's pie instead! ;-)

Sam, Problemchildbride said...

Ducks? Is duck a traditional St. Patrick's Day meat then?

I like cabbage. I genuinely do. I like the way it squeaks on your teeth when you chew. My husband thinks I'm an abomination. I turn round and accuse him of being a mid-westerner (I know, I know, its out of line, but he makes me so angry sometimes) and that soon shuts him up.

iconoclastical said...

Hold on tight, Manuel!

i don't know about how you celebrate St. Patty's day on your side of the pond, but here, we dye our river green, drink green beer until we puke green vomit and affix "kiss me, i'm irish" buttons to anything not moving fast enough.

as a steakhouse server in the 'burbs, this means that i will spend my evening dusting things and looking over at the "irish" pub across the street.

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