Smart arse just got smarter, and arsier (it's a word)

Cow: contains blood

"Oi, excuse me waiter there is blood pouring out of my steak!"

"Eh, no there isn't sir", replies the devilishly handsome if rather cuddly waiter.

"WHAT! ARE YOU FUCKING BLIND? LOOK, THERE, ON THE PLATE, BLOOD EVERYWHERE!" The exasperated customer splashes the "blood" with his fork in an attempt to prove his point. But it's a futile act as the waiter rather confidently (smugly) counters with,

"That's not blood. When this particular moo cow was pulled from the field, stuffed into a lorry, moved to the slaughter house, stunned, and then cut from head to toe all most all of the blood was drained out. That sir, is myoglobin. That's MY-O-GLO-BIN sir. It stores oxygen in the muscles sir."

His face contorted with rage and going red as all the globin, both myo and hemo rushed to his face the customer let loose with, "YOU...WHAT...CHEEKY LITTLE BASTARD...I'LL MYO-FUCKING-GLOBIN YOU. GET ME A MANAGER!!!!"

One day I'll use that snippet of information, one day soon....

I gleaned this information from "What Einstein Told His Cook" by Robert L. Wolke. It shall be the basis of many a great come back. So now the smart arsed waiter can get even smarter, and arsier...Brilliant!

Steak: does not contain blood