Saturday, 22 March 2008

Can you survive five hours?

Good Friday always brings the best out of people what with the reduced drinking hours.

And despite signs on the doors and at the bar, despite being told by the bar staff and waiting staff things like this keep happening....

between the hours of 12 and 5 this is a water glass
k?

"Can I get a pint?"

"No, it's Good Friday, no alcohol of any sort until 5pm sir. Sorry bout that."

It went quiet for a moment whilst he considered his next move. I stood there with a forced smile. It was dragging on a bit so I thought I should help him out and I offered him a few options.

"Coke, water, orange, coffee?"

He raised a finger to stop me and said, "I'll have the fish special and a glass of Chardonnay."

"Eh no sir, wine is off the menu until 5pm. That's what I meant by no alcohol."

He tutted and opined, "It's not really alcohol....'

Que?

Now I'm no expert, saying that I have done a wine course, but I'm pretty damn sure that wine is an alcohol based beverage.

He looked me straight in the eyes and said/begged, "If you put 2 in a pint glass no one will know, eh eh." He thought this was genius of course.

"Not gonna happen sir. You wanna coke or summat?"

He didn't like it, didn't like it at all and shooed me away with an order for the fish special and a jug of water.

When I cleared his mains away I offered him the whiskey trifle, he didn't like that idea either.

Pfft......

Five hours, that's all it is, five whole hours without booze. Five tiny hours a year, and people go mental. They lose all sense of proportion and start screaming about their human rights. I'm not sure I ever read the UN declaration on the right to get blitzed everyday of the year. Still it makes me giggle every year without fail.

18 People trying to get Manuel's attention:

samcrea said...

Its meant to be, NO Booze All Day, Mr Waiter. 5 Hours, why not just let the guy have the drink since you aint sticking to the rules properly anyway??

Manuel said...

Sam Crea: welcome n that...not actually true there sam, that maybe the case in the south, but up here in the north we are allowed 5/6 hours of drinking booze.

samcrea said...

Shit, I forgot it was called the World Wide Web,
I enjoy your posts

signed

The Angry Barman

Manuel said...

Sam: cheers.....tis a small world now....apparently....saying that I've never ran into Beyonce...

daisyfae said...

that's what flasks are for... sheesh... you mean i've got to teach the irish to drink?

Native Minnow said...

I was thinking the flask thing would have worked well for the guy too, and I don't even drink!

savannah said...

has it always been that way in ireland? i remember that shops used to close for 3 hours on good friday (12-3pm) but i was a kid out in los angeles, so i don't know if it was city wide or just my neighborhood. but to the larger point of your post, it does give one pause...if the law was EVERYONE MUST drink, do you think people wouldn't just to spite the law? (i'm laughing here, sugar, hope you are, too!) xoxox

(oh.my.gawd! will i wake up to a post about "7 wiseguys visit manuel for dinner at 8pm on saturday" on sunday morning???)

MJ said...

5 hours without booze?

Yours is a cruel and unforgiving country.

Manuel said...

daisyfae: bwahahahaha

minnow: he's a drunk, what can you do, you cant expect him to think for himself....

savannah: it's always been like this....it's not as bad as it once was....they don't tie the swings up any more.....

mj: I know......when you consider our problems it really is cruel to take our booze away...

Gypsy said...

G'day Manuel
Christ, even the casino isn't open here on Good Friday so good luck getting a drink anywhere, at anytime in our fair city.

I actually just came by to wish you and LMM a very Happy Easter. Hope the punters treat you well over the weekend and tip generously.

Nick said...

Why do some people always think they can get round the rules if they're just persistent and ingratiating enough? And I bet they wouldn't be so cooperative if you tried to get something out of them.

Jenny and I went to Ginger last night btw. Didn't think it was quite as perfect as you did but it was good - excellent vegetarian food, discreet but attentive service, relaxed atmosphere, and good acoustics that meant we couldn't hear anyone else's conversations. Four out of five.

Queenie said...

Licencing laws still make me laugh...well something has to!

Here in sunny Cork there was a sea of very classy black plastic covering the booze aisles in the shops, just so we wouldn't contaminate our eyes should we glance upon the cans of Stella on the Good Friday!

Don't think Jesus would have minded if we all got pissed yesterday, after Mass of course!

jen said...

Being a newbie here, I didn't know about this no-drink business until yesterday.

But there's something about how it's ok to drink on trains? How did that one come about?

Medbh said...

What an asshat.
Bet he does that every year.

Anonymous Boxer said...

I can easily go 5 hours without a drink.... now, tell me it's five hours without my coffee...

and we'd have a big problem.

ellie said...

In answer to your question ... No!
I spent the day in the Maiden City and sitting in the bar sipping coffee and waiting for the bar to serve booze was hell.
Every bar also had a fish special on the menu as it was a holy day.

Ed said...

Aye, my mates from Dublin were up this weekend and couldn't believe how early the bar closed on Saturday.

People get a little loco without the boose. Which basically means they're alcos

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