Monday, 16 April 2007

Yap Yap Yap



As the proprietor of such quality establishments as The Merchant Hotel you would have to admit Bill Wolsley knows a thing or two about running bars, restaurants, hotels etc. The Merchant is a very classy operation, I nearly put a tie on just to go on their website, and kudos to him for even contemplating such a venture. Oh how the naysayers and doom merchants were proved wrong with regard to the sucess of that little venture. Anything new or different or that doesn't sell blue WKD is condemed before it evens opens in this town. The Belfast people really are little rays of sunlight. But I nearly spat my cup of darjeeling over the TV a couple of weeks ago when our intrepid hero was bemoaning the lack of local hospitality talent. He was explaining to the Paxman why he had to look to the East (of Europe) to find suitable staff.

Now don't get me wrong I have no problem with people moving here to find a better life. Some of my best friends are Scottish. But please don't try and tell me there is no talent here! Mr Wolsley you are so very wrong. I have worked with some fantastic and very talented people over the years. These are people who enjoyed the work, enjoyed the hours, God some of them even enjoyed the customers. But they all evetually left for jobs in the Civil Service or retail and so on, not because they wanted to further their careers in Dunnes Stores (better value beats them all) or because they had a burning desire to help single mothers get cash out of bad dads. They left because they couldn't put up with the shite pay, shite "benefits", and the general devaluing of the job over the years.

So Bill Wolsley is wrong, there is plenty of local talent, they just aren't mithered enough to do it for minimum wage. Local operators aren't going to attract the people they need from the indigenous population. But you can shove your Bently were the sun don't shine if you start blaming the schools and government or the lack of proper local government for this situation. Local operators need to look a little closer to home to find the fault/solution.

The WellDoneFillet guide to solving your recruitment problems:

  1. PAY MORE (no surprise here) and you will attract and retain better people. The "2 arms 2 legs" approach to recruitment isn't going to produce winners.
  2. Training needs to improve, invest properly and get the rewards.
  3. Value the position more, stop allowing the abuse and bullshit staff have to take on a daily basis, both from customers and insecure managers.
  4. Apprenticeships are the best way to create and mould the bar staff and waiters of the future. It would also put the craft and skill back in the business.
Quit the yapping and more of the thinking please.

Teachers have been yapping too. The NASUWT held their annual conference in Belfast this week. Wonderful a 1000+ sandal wearing, Guardian reading, real ale drinking extra saddists in town for a week. They were very upset about the harassment and bullying they have to put up with at work. And rightly so. A few well place nipple tweaks, wedgies, and head's down toilets would soon put it out of the little shites. But if you are going to batter on about workplaces free from harassment and bullying it's best to practice what you preach. What's that about bullys having been bullied?

I've heard more than a few stories this week from wait/bar staff who had to feed and water this lot this week. Bad manners, rude, childish to the point of feet stamping, screaming and shouting, finger clicking and generally acting like well slapped arses and that was just one night. Believe me I love a good generalisation/stereotype but without fear of contradiction or hyperbole teachers are the worst group of people you can ever hope to serve. And they never tip. Bastards.

Keates give me 1000 lines on the board, EAT PAY TIP LEAVE!

Sweet Mother of Jesus It ain't easy being right all the time. Oh wait, it is!

12 People trying to get Manuel's attention:

paddy said...

You can't sing but man you sure can write. Make three wishes! Sincerely Paddy.

paddy said...

Throw funny into the mix too. "just like tha'"

Manuel said...

Cheers Paddy, but as my father used to say "you cant get drunk on compliments!" give me your money! joke

Fat Sparrow said...

Teachers are just hippies that have managed to get a job; you can't expect them to be civilized.

Troika said...

Teachers are the scum of the earth. I can't even begin to explain what a complete fucking waste of time and money the lot of the dumb bastards are.

And they are all, with exception, really really fucking dull.

They should all be drowned in dog shit.

Troika said...

with exception? You know what I mean.

Fat Sparrow said...

Well, obviously not the hot ones that will shag you.

Old Knudsen said...

I read the headlines of the internet bullying at schooland thought it was kids ganging up on kids, then I find out its the kids taking pics of the teachers and photoshopping them onto the net, wise up people grow some balls. The ones that used to cane me were in no way hippies.

Manuel said...

Fat Sparrow: Yes, yes they are

Troika: Dog shit or a huge basket of socks and sandals

Old K: Correct, sadists of the worst kind who would have taken a much more direct sort of action with this sort of arsing around. Bedwetters

whyioughtta said...

Like a good patron, I won't stay long...just lurking, laughing, and leaving.

Great post. Glad Fat Sparrow put her readers on to you.

Manuel said...

"Her?" Jesus I though it was a man! Cheers though.

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