Competitive moms
As I stood at my front door, smoking my breakfast, on Sunday morning a chill went down my back. I was gripped with fear. I began to shake and my mind was awash with a nightmare from not so long ago. And I don't mean Saturday night. Vivid flashbacks engulfed me, greens and swirly things and golds and tears. Soon my lovely, quaint wee restaurant would be filled with the children of the corn with their scary hair and scary complexions. Oh the hair it scares me so.
Is it real?
Does it move on it's own?
Why the hair?
Is there power within the hair?
But it's more than the hair. It's so much more than the hair and the vivid complexions. It was too late to phone in sick. Maybe I could cause an accident on the way in. Maybe I could throw myself down the stairs. I'm far to much of a chicken for that.
Shit.
I would just have to take my chances. I would have to be a brave little soldier.
Be tough, yeah!
Go Team Me!
For Sunday, dear friends, saw the return of......
Is it real?
Does it move on it's own?
Why the hair?
Is there power within the hair?
But it's more than the hair. It's so much more than the hair and the vivid complexions. It was too late to phone in sick. Maybe I could cause an accident on the way in. Maybe I could throw myself down the stairs. I'm far to much of a chicken for that.
Shit.
I would just have to take my chances. I would have to be a brave little soldier.
Be tough, yeah!
Go Team Me!
For Sunday, dear friends, saw the return of......
THE IRISH DANCING WORLD CHAMPIONSHIPS!
AAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGHHH!
TEN THOUSAND OF THEM N ALL!!
they're not right......
look at the hair!!!
the hair!!!!
But it's not the kids I'm scared off. It's the mothers, or should I say moms. It's the Americans, oh sweet jumping Jesus they scare the creak right out of my back. You see I assumed Irish Dancing was an enjoyable way for people to take part in Irish culture. But not so for the Americans. Hell no. They are here to win. And they approach jumping about with a straight back as serious as they do the 100 metres. I assume without the performance enhancing drugs, but it wouldn't surprise me. Who do they think they are coming over here with their positive mental attitudes and "winners don't eat chips" diets. This weeks gonna be "fun" eh......
I might have to go back on the oysters........
I might have to go back on the oysters........
28 People trying to get Manuel's attention:
Irish dancing is the single dorkiest kind of dancing in the cosmos. Some of these people can bend their knees the wrong way! Gah! And why no arm movements? It's not like people have tiny wee inexpressive T-Rex arms. why do the dangle so uselessly. It looks so uncomfortable and unnatural, a blur of knee-socks and rubber legs. I did not get the mass appeal of Riverdance at all so I reckon it might just be me, but watching on the telly is enough to make you think you're vertical-hold's gone on the picture.
The judges of these things must have Shirley Temple fetishes too. That hair!
Your vertical hold. Far be it from me to accuse anyone of being a vertical hold.
I never got the Joey Deacon dancing. I find it even funnier now that they think everyone in Ireland must have curly tresses and to stand a chance of winning the "wear an invisible straight jacket" competition you HAVE to have curly hair, even if it's polyester and comes from China.
Go back to MSB for some of their poisonous oysters. That should do it. Better still, send THEM there.
Sam: oh I blame flatley for all of it. It used to be fine in church halls and at parish sports days and what have you......he made them see the cash potential......the bastard....
bbb: what the fuck is with the wigs? what? I never said it was MSB's oysters.....i also didn't say it wasn't theirs either.....
This reeks of Jon Benet Ramsey syndrome.
Who would put that much makeup on a child?
Madness.
medbh: it used to be "sweet Irish coleens" with big leg muscles, now it's pre teens model types.......all very stepford wives type stuff......not like when i did ballet at all.......
Kind of like the little kids at the beauty pageant in Little Miss Sunshine, these ones creep me out.
As no one else is going to own up to it, I like to look at their knickers when they jump.
minnow: with the sleazy grandads too....
old k: ........dirty dirty dirty....I'm telling Ian...
Oh jeez, I looked! I looked at the hair!
THE HORROR....................
Were you having coffee when you smoked your breakfast? Because that's known as a whore's breakfast. Are you a whore, or do you just eat like one?
thank god they're all on your side of the pond... creepy, bouncy, robotic stepford corn-children. safe for me to hit the local irish-esque pubs for the next week.
the hair reminds me of pasta. strange that you don't get the hair... i always thought that was part of the culture.
Oh good gawd I looked at the hair and I'm damaged.
Again, another reason why Our Lord wept.
I'd have to run and hide. They give me the creeps.
damn, i had no idea y'all felt so strongly about american participation, sugar! our lil ole town has sent 2 darling children over to dance for all ya'll! (sadly, all the poor cherubs could talk about was winning something, anything, her with her bouncing curls and him all dark haired and blue eyed...wonder if those were contacts..you know, for effect)
boxer: oh the horror eh....
witchypoo: I had just finished some, so what does that make me? part whore?
daisyfae: no! the hair thing is fairly new.......no need....
mj: you were always damaged....
traveling.....: welcome, he wasn't the only one...
savannah: it's not American participation, it's their winning everything that's the problem......
sweet jesus, you mean these kids have a chance of winning???? my gawd, sugar, no wonder all ya'll are upset!
you'll love this
it's all happening in the bronx, sugar!
and there's a video!
Savannah: oh hell yeah, Americans don't lose!! Oh my god! what's gone wrong in the bronx!!!!?
savannah: actually they are really good......
That link is brilliant, Savannah. That was sheer pleasure to watch.
I'm decorating you with bling, my pretty...
Bloody hell it was a miracle if my hair was brushed -
smoking your breakfast - lol
sam: really good dancers eh.....
witchypoo: awh shucks thanks.....
flirty: that's my best line in ages......
Yes it is increadibly difficult to out-naff Morris dancing, but we did it, by jove.
You'll be stunned to know that's not real hair....like the mad fake tans and the panstick make-up, the hair's fake too.
I'm an Irish Londoner living in Birmingham and there are professional wig makers who make kiddy sized wigs for the little freaks.
Once upon a time, it was a country dance now, even before that feckin' Riverdance, there are insane super-competitive mothers, girls in wigs, 3 inches of slap and eye crunching miniskirt costumes so short they have to co-ordinate their underwear.
Wow, a whole week of that. You must have been thanking God when they'd gone.
成人電影,情色,本土自拍, 情色聊天室, 寄情築園小遊戲, AV女優,成人電影,情色,本土自拍, A片下載, 日本A片, 麗的色遊戲, 色色網, ,嘟嘟情人色網, 色情網站, 成人網站, 正妹牆, 正妹百人斬, aio,伊莉, 伊莉討論區, 成人遊戲, 成人影城,
ut聊天室, 免費A片, AV女優, 美女視訊, 情色交友, 免費AV, 色情網站, 辣妹視訊, 美女交友, 色情影片 成人影片, 成人網站, A片,H漫, 18成人, 成人圖片, 成人漫畫, 情色網,
美女交友, 嘟嘟成人網, 成人貼圖, 成人電影, A片, 豆豆聊天室, 聊天室, UT聊天室, 尋夢園聊天室, 男同志聊天室, UT男同志聊天室, 聊天室尋夢園, 080聊天室, 080苗栗人聊天室, 6K聊天室, 女同志聊天室, 小高聊天室, 情色論壇, 色情網站, 成人網站, 成人論壇, 免費A片, 上班族聊天室, 成人聊天室, 成人小說, 微風成人區, 色美媚部落格, 成人文章, 成人圖片區, 免費成人影片, 成人論壇,
日本A片, 愛情公寓, 情色, 舊情人, 情色貼圖, 情色文學, 情色交友, 色情聊天室, 色情小說, 一葉情貼圖片區, 情色小說, 色情, 色情遊戲, 情色視訊, 情色電影, aio交友愛情館, 色情a片, 一夜情, 辣妹視訊, 視訊聊天室, 免費視訊聊天, 免費視訊, 視訊, 視訊美女, 美女視訊, 視訊交友, 視訊聊天, 免費視訊聊天室, 情人視訊網影音視訊聊天室, 視訊交友90739, 成人影片, 成人交友, 本土自拍, 免費A片下載, 性愛,
成人交友, 嘟嘟成人網, 成人電影, 成人, 成人貼圖, 成人小說, 成人文章, 成人圖片區, 免費成人影片, 成人遊戲, 微風成人, 愛情公寓, 情色, 情色貼圖, 情色文學, 做愛, 色情聊天室, 色情小說, 一葉情貼圖片區, 情色小說, 色情, 寄情築園小遊戲, 色情遊戲情色視訊, 情色電影, aio交友愛情館, 言情小說, 愛情小說, 色情A片, 情色論壇, 色情影片, 視訊聊天室, 免費視訊聊天, 免費視訊, 視訊美女, 視訊交友, 視訊聊天, 免費視訊聊天室, a片下載, aV, av片, A漫, av dvd, av成人網, 聊天室, 成人論壇, 本土自拍, 自拍, A片,成人電影,情色,本土自拍,
Post a Comment