Sunday, 25 November 2007

"With the greatest of respect..."

Customer: "So Manuel what do you do?"

Manuel: "Excuse me?"

Customer: "I mean, with the greatest of respect, this cant be your main thing. Are you studying or something?"

Manuel: "Sir, this IS what I do. Here's your soup.".......[plop]

Fucking prick. It was all I could do not to pull out my waiters friend , flick out the little knife and very slowly cut his tongue out, with the greatest of respect that is. There'd be no more condescending remarks out of him. He enjoyed the next 1 hour and forty five minutes of service in silence.......

27 People trying to get Manuel's attention:

Toast said...

kill him in the face

Old Knudsen said...

No seriously are you studying to be a bin man or road sweeper? did you leave school at 12 to be stuck as a waiter ?

Old Knudsen said...

No offense meant of course I'm sure pizza hut fired you for a good reason.

Nick said...

I used to get that question sometimes when I worked in a bookshop. Actually, I enjoy it, isn't that enough? I have no desire to be a chartered accountant / stockbroker / advertising executive thank you very much. And then of course they'd reveal the level of their own aspirations by buying some crap books suitable for a ten-year-old.

Mudflapgypsy said...

I agree with toast, what a great line !

Manny just tell them that waiting is your only recourse after your rehabilitation.

Chummy said...

Yeah do else do you do?

Rosie Cheeks said...

ouch

livesbythewoods said...

Look on the bright side - I bet nobody's ever assumed you were a bloody typist as you sat at a desk in their office, repairing the PC that their idiot colleague had broken by uploading illegally-copied games.

fatmammycat said...

What an obnoxious bastard. He needs to be sneered at. I'm offering my services. I'll sneer him good and proper.

ellie said...

Cheeky fucker. You need to find a better class of customaer.

MJ said...

I'll team up with Fatmammycat.

She'll sneer.

I'll slap.

Come to think of that, there's money to made in that idea. Knudsen would pay for it.

Dennis said...

"Actually, Sir -- and I do appreciate you asking -- I settled in this job after being fired from another industry. I worked at an orange juice factory in East Belfast, but was let go because I couldn't concentrate."

Peace,

- Dennis
www.donttipthewaiter.blogspot.com

Medbh said...

You could add that you run a popular blog which makes fun of lousy pricks like him.

Asshole.

Manuel Estimulo said...

Hola Other Manuel--

You should have say to him, "No, sir. I also donate sperm on a regular basis. Here's your soup. Enjoy."

dave said...

I bet you also pimp out girls on the Lisburn road.

gimme a minute said...

The society that values those that sell you shit you don't want or need over those who bring you food and are polite to you is one in which I no longer want to live.

I'm moving to Rwanda. Once I've saved enough for a PS3. And have spent some time playing with it.

Anonymous Boxer said...

Grrrrrrrrrr.

yoyo said...

"You should have say to him, "No, sir. I also donate sperm on a regular basis. Here's your soup. Enjoy."

Ahhhh!! :D That made me grin and want to vomit at the same time.

Chances are the snotty git didnt ask you that to offend.. hopefully..


Manuel gets honorable mention:
http://blimplike.diaryland.com/

Medbh said...

Have you seen this yet, Manuel? It's a documentary on the history of LOL cats. Hilarious.

http://pandagon.blogsome.com/2007/11/22/thanks-for-lolcats/

hyperhan said...

What a: wanker/dickweed/prick/wab/cunt*

*Delete as appropriate...

Manuel said...

Toast: Fantastic, I'll be using that....

Old K: I left of my own accord.....Haagen Das had other ideas though....

Nick: Exactly! If you find your thing stick with it.

Flapster: for what though....

Chummy: I beat people, beat em hard.....

Rosie: It hurt I can tell you.....

LBTW: I feel your pain....

FMC: I still have his booking info....

Ellie: No such thing, more class means "wittier" put downs....cunts

MJ: Knudsen would rather pay to watch me being humiliated....

Dennis: All the orange factories are in East Belfast......hehehehehe

Medbh: Impertinent or what? Popular? Crikey.....

Manuel Estimulo: Hola Other other Manuel! I hope you are good. You ain't been round these parts recently. I wouldn't waste good man muck on him....

Dave: often....

Gimme: I'll go too.....I hear they have nice hotels....

Boxer: I concur.....

YOYO: Cheers for the mention. No he probably didn't but he did all the same. It's all about the devaluing of the job. In a way it's a bit of a back handed compliment...

Medbh: Seen it LOL!!

Hyperhan: I deleted none of them.... they all fit....

Manuel said...

ps wab? brilliant one from the old days.....

ellie said...

HAHAHA @ hyperhan. Haven't heard anyone being called a wab in years. I think I shall seek out a wab tomorrow and tell them just what they are.

ellie said...

Manuel you beat my by a minute on that last comment ...grrrrrrr.

Manuel said...

Ellie: WAB is just such a good word isn't it?! I too will be seeking a wab for tomorrow....i suspect I shall not have to search too hard.....

Mudflapgypsy said...

Manny, tell them you are rehabilitated from randomly stabbing people in the eye with a fork.

Either they'll be super polite or will run away screaming.

Wab is such a great word.

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