Friday, 2 November 2007

The Bizarro Dwarves are not my friends

Manuel didn't finish his photography course

I am the sort of person who gets excited about things. I'm an emotional person. When I'm up I'm very up and when I'm down I just want to cry all the time. There is rarely any happy medium. I hadn't been so excited about seeing a band since I saw Morrissey a few years back. People don't show their emotions enough these days. I'm not sure if it's just people being too cool or maybe it's just that younger people aren't easily impressed any more. I was as giddy as fat girl in a sweet shop. And I wasn't let down.

When I picked up the tickets for the gig a few weeks back I hadn't realised it was on Halloween night. It just never dawned on me. So there we were in the bar surrounded by witches, goblins, about 5 Wonder Women (not all were women, not all were wonderful), numerous Spidermen, Batmen, and Captain America's. The best costume had to be the two guys one dressed as Pacman one dressed as a Ghost. The Ghost chased Pacman up and down the street to the amusement of all in the queue. The queue for the National was much more sober than the queue for the Halloween party next door. The National's music doesn't lend itself to dressing up like a Wookie. I had a rather fetching scarf on which was removed quickly when someone asked if I had come as Guy Ritchie. Cheeky bastard.

Wednesday night's gig was out-fucking-standing. Both The National and St.Vincent put on great performances. Although I've never quite understood why people go to gigs and stand with their backs to the stage talking loudly about haircuts and shoes and other such bollocks. That gets right up my jacksie. And definitely impacted on my enjoyment of St.Vincent's performance. Honestly you just want to smack those people, preferably with a stool to the back of the head. But she is coming back to Belfast again at the end of November for a gig at Queen's Speakeasy, so I might take LMM to that.

The National rocked. But within minutes of them appearing on stage the tallest man in the building took up residence right in front of me. We had secured what can only described as the perfect viewing position, beside the bar with a clear unbroken view to the stage. Well unbroken until Johnny Long Balls showed up. And there was no moving him. I couldn't see a thing. I spent the first 3 songs hoping about trying to get a decent view. But thankfully Johnny Long Balls and his freakish genes fucked off after that. They played all the favourites, "Apartment Story", "Start a war", "Mistaken for Strangers", and many more. If you want a proper review of the gig best try somewhere else. I'm still not well enough for that.

They played two encores, the second I missed as I was in the toilet. That is just very annoying. But I did get to shake hands with the one of them after. That must have been nice for him, "Shfucking great there mate. Lovely stuff, lovely stuff.........." As long as I didn't chuck up on him that's okay. There was plenty of that to come......

No honestly I didn't......

When we got back to my house, my cousin and I that is, we cracked open a spiffing bottle of Marlborough Pinot Noir and (why did there need to be an "and") a bottle of Bombay Sapphire Gin. That's were things went very badly wrong. When we got home we were not drunk. But that didn't last long. Generous measures of gin mixed with the buzz and excitement from the gig ensured that sobriety was very quickly replaced with drunkenness. I don't remember going to bed. I don't remember Ciaran leaving to go home the next day. I don't remember him being sick in my spare room (and making a half arsed effort to clean it up).

I spent Thursday in bed with the bizarro dwarves, coughy, sicky, sweaty, horny (always a strange hangover side effect), depresso, shaky, and hallucinationo. It was awful. "Oh sweet Jebus take me now" sort of awful. Song lyrics were going round my head, the same song lyrics over and over and over again. LMM came round, offered some sympathy and then left. Bizarro dwarf number 4 wasn't making for a relaxing and enjoyable night, particularly as I kept throwing up. "Awh but darling......[boke boke boke wipe residual vomit from lips]....I love you." Smooth. The night didn't get any better. I watched "Britz" on Channel 4, a film about a British suicide bomber. It just depressed the hell out of me. So I have decided I ain't drinking again. Never gonna happen.........

Saying that I'm going out on Saturday night, crikey.......

33 People trying to get Manuel's attention:

Twenty Major said...

Bombay Sapphire Gin

An easy and painful mistake to make. That wonderful stuff has kicked the shit out of me a few times.

Manuel said...

Twenty: Yup particularly when you are pouring your own measures with a generous hand.

ellie said...

There are two things essential to enjoying a gig ....
the tallest man in the building blocking your view and generous measures of gin!
Sounds like you had an excellent night out. I have to wait until the 22nd for my next concert... :(

Happy Birthday again, since I don't know if it has passed yet.

Manuel said...

Ellie: Not until Sunday. 22nd eh? Who's that then?

Anonymous Boxer said...

Bombay Sapphire Gin - that's the 100 proof stuff and shouldn't be mixed with other alcohols, or my liver (ever again.)

But, oh it looks so pretty in the bottle, all blue and stuff. Until it's heaved up... not so pretty.

Upset Waitress said...

Every seasoned drunk knows you get up at 3 in the afternoon and drink club soda(never water) followed by a cheese burger. If you would've followed the basic rules for drunkedness you wouldn't have had to sleep with dwarfs.

ellie said...

Meat Loaf again! I'm an addict!
Mother nature is cruel, making you horny when you are at your least attractive, hung over, stinking of vomit and bleary eyed!!

savannah said...

wine and gin?? oh my, sugar...that just won't do...ever upset waitress is so right about how to chase the blue meanies away...club soda and a greasy burger...eaten very slowly...

MJ said...

Wait. Back up to the part about shaking hands after you'd been in the toilets.

Did you wash your hands first?

Manuel said...

Boxer: Better in the bottle than over my bedroom floor, kitchen sink, toilet, etc

Upset Waitress: 3 O'clock my arse! I was still in bed at 6.....

Ellie: Correct, on both counts...

Savannah: I had a curry about midnight. Seemed to work.....

MJ: As always! Saying that I did meet one of my regular restaurant customers in the toilet who winked at me as he was shaking his winkle....

gimme a minute said...

I haven't been able to drink Bombay Sapphire since I overdid it about six months ago and lived with the dwarves for three days.

I was dry heaving for about 12 hours. Good ab workout that.

Manuel said...

Gimme: Thank Christ! I thought it was just me! I was dry heaving for hours.....

bendersbetterbrother said...

Fuck's sake man, it was only gin, not Kryptonite. Sure it wasn't a dirty glasss?

Niall said...

dirty with what more gin?? dude you done yourself proud, a blow out is a blowout and u prob needed it! keep it up, the trick is to just not sober up

Manuel said...

BBB: I was thinking that then LMM pointed out that she had washed the glasses the previous evening so that excuse if off the table....

Niall: Yes, yes I did deserve it.....

Upset Waitress said...

No hair on the dog? No cheese burger? You're a shitty drunk.

Manuel said...

chicken curry and a cup of tea, quality drunk actually.....

Upset Waitress said...

Chicken Curry? Bombay? You are going to need a snow cone to put the fire out that's soon to be flaming from your ass-pipe my friend!

Curly K said...

Shit, I love gin (and wine) and someone has just given me a bottle of Blue Sapphire Gin. It doesn't always make people talk to God on the big white telephone does it? If so, I shall have to stick to the old reliables of Gordons, CDC..... Can't face more dry retching - did enough of that after nights in the Bot & Egg in another life!!! LOL

Manuel said...

upset waitress: I'm a "man" I can handle it...

Curly K: Hello, you're new, welcome. Yes I'm sorry to say that it does. But it does it with more class than Gordons....

Mudflapgypsy said...

Gin. I've never had the (dis)pleasure, smells too funny for me to drink.

My personal ticket to 24hrs of hell has alway been pints of guinness followed by a bottle of red wine. 100% guaranteed to fuck me up and have me wondering if this really is the end.

A feed of whisky (I was in Scotland) had me turn green and lose a day of my life and I like whisk(e)y but it doesn't like me anymore.

Manny, go have a drink tonight. You know you want to.

Manuel said...

Mudders: No,no I don't

Medbh said...

Gin is a nasty potion, Manuel.
DO NOT WANT.

If I mix red wine with anything, I will hurl. Sounds like a lovely evening otherwise.

Manuel said...

"Lovely" not the woord I would have used but yes it was

Medbh said...

Manuel, have you seen this for your other blog?

http://icanhascheezburger.com/2007/11/02/pardonay-mwah-do-u-has-reservation/

Manuel said...

Medbh: Hahahhahahaha that's brilliant....

toast said...

I'm very very jealous, i love The National, really really love them, they played manchester last night, but due to unforseen circumstances I had to be in portglenfuckingone.... this is not a state of affairs that will do at all...

Manuel said...

Toast: They were really really good it has to be said.

Toast said...

woo hoo - i'm an idiot - it appears its tomo0rrow actually - it sold out weeks ago but touty magoo should be able to help...

Manuel said...

Toast: Pay the money, it will be worth it. And if St. Vincent is doing the support.....tremendous.....

Toast said...

20 Quid very well spent Manuel - but by christ i am feeling it today

http://ysr23.com/blog/?p=501

Manuel said...

Fantastic photos man.....

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